Over the last year, I have given some thought and conclusions to what people call the deconstructing of their faith. We are in the midst of the great falling away. People are declaring on their social media 'why' they aren't following Jesus down the narrow path anymore after years of believing. Instead of shouting from the rooftops of the revealed light of God in darkness, they are shouting their truth and experience from a greater darkness than before.

After nightfall, go outside for 15 minutes tonight until your eyes are used to the dark. Then, come inside, where the lights are bright, for 5 minutes. Return to the night sky, and you will see how much darker it got after exposure to the light.

I thought deconstructing was terrible. But then God shared with me something else happening in the Church that was not as loud and boisterous as the deconstructing crowd. It is those who are silently quitting Jesus. They are doing the same deconstruction but doing so silently.

The year 2020 was a mess of a year. Many people got loud and voiced their opinions on anything and everything. There was an exodus of employees quitting their jobs and becoming part of the influencer market or Gig market. Many were deconstructing capitalism or the American way. But another crowd didn't raise a voice: the silent quitters. The silent quitters are the crowd that economists and headhunters are calling the silent quitters. They continue to go to work but do as little as possible. They, too, have deconstructed capitalism and the American way but still want the payday.

The deconstructionists and the silent quitters in the world mirror what is happening in the Church. People who once married are now divorcing Jesus publicly and privately. Not all people deconstructing the faith were true Christians, born-again believers. But some did experience the forgiveness of sin through the shed blood of Jesus. Some did see and embrace the cross as the power to overcome. But now there is a great divorce. Christians are divorcing God, publicly and privately.

Some are divorcing God publicly because they never really were married to God. They were attempting to live with Him, move in with Him without committing to Christ Jesus.

Some are divorcing God privately because they have some sense of truth but haven't made a lifetime commitment. They are like Joseph, who was betrothed to Mary. But when Mary was found to be pregnant, Joseph secretly sought to put her away privately. Joseph was a righteous man, like many people in the Church. But how will we respond when God does something we don't understand, don't expect, and is even offensive to us? A pregnant Mary by the Holy Spirit had to be offensive to Joseph.

Joseph had a visitation of an Angel who explained so that he could stay the course of the Marriage. But it was offensive, and Joseph took a loss of reputation with the culture and society around him. But God doesn't always explain His ways. And many times, He won't. Eat my flesh and drink my blood, Jesus told His disciples. Seventy disciples were offended and walked away to no longer follow Jesus. Jesus confronted the remaining twelve and asked if they would also walk. Peter answered for them all and said where would we go? We gave up everything to follow you! In other words, Peter was offended as well. Then, he corrected himself: You have the words (terms) of Eternal Life. We will stay.

Offense to God's ways is the real reason why people are deconstructing the faith and silently quitting God. As God shared with me in my heart one night, People love Me. But they don't like Me. I was astonished and left without words. In fact, I laughed out loud because I thought it was a joke in my mind. I love you but don't like you. That has come out of many of our mouths when discussing family members, church members, and co-workers. But it was no joke in my mind. It was God sharing His heart with me. The laughter ceased, and my heart was broken. My mind raced to the idea: do I love God but don't like Him? I have been offended by God's ways recently. My heart cried out, God, I love You and like You; help me like You more!

I love you but don't like you. Or I love but don't like you right now. Or I love you but don't like your ways. We feel like this with people in our lives. But what does it mean to like? There is a play on words that God was speaking to me. He wasn't asking me if I liked Him, like high schoolers looking for a sure date. God was asking me if I wanted to become like Him. Not the same question that the devil tripped Eve up in the garden. Eat this fruit, and you will become like God, judging between good and evil.

To like God or become like God is part of our heavenly Father's plan. We are born-again in spirit, then start the process of renewing the mind to the ways of God and will one day finish with a new immortal body. We are to learn His ways and walk in them. But we don't want God if we don't like His ways and won't walk in them. We may love God, but we don't like Him.

Isn't that what we hear from so many divorcees? We still love each other, but we can't do life together. We have too many disagreements as to how life should be lived. We have irreconcilable differences, but we do love each other.

There is a mystery of Marriage. That mystery is Jesus and His Church. Husbands love your wife as Jesus loves the Church by laying down your life. And the wives respect their husbands. Jesus is the head of the husband, and the husband is the head of the wife. This is not a hierarchal system as much as a chain of responsibility—a message for another time.

People get married because of love, and they divorce, still in love. They separate because they don't like each other. They don't like each other ways and won't agree. How many people love God but have separated because they don't like His ways? The prophet Amos said unless two agree, how can they walk together? If we love God but don't like Him, we won't walk Him. We will separate.

I found seven reasons why people get married from several websites. People get married over love and trust. Love and trust are also why people get saved.

People get married because of their religion and values. Most people choose the religion and values they were brought up in. Plenty of people call themselves Christian because of their upbringing and not an experience of Jesus.

People get married because of tradition. And breaking tradition is frowned upon, so get married so you don't have to answer why you are not married. People attend Church for the same reason: tradition, not revelation.

People get married because they want a family. Marriage is the easiest way to have a family. Coming to Jesus will give you a family in the Church.

People get married because of the hope of financial stability or buying power. Life is more expensive when you do it alone. Some people are in the Church because of the promise of the prosperity gospel alone.

Convenience is another reason people get married. Just like finances, it is more difficult alone. God created Adam and said it is not good for man to be alone. Not because Adam was lonely; Adam wasn't self-conscience at that point; he walked with God and had a great job. But Adam couldn't multiply his kind or work in the garden. If the knowledge of God was to cover the earth as the waters cover the sea, then Adam couldn't remain alone; it wasn't convenient.

Some people get married because they are lonely and need companionship. Most people need companionship with intimacy that is only legal in Marriage between one man and one woman. One pastor from my past said some people come to Church for galvation and not salvation.

What are the reasons people get divorced or deconstruct their Marriage? Or some silently quit their Marriage.

Divorce happens because of the lack of family support. A marriage can't survive without witnesses bringing correction and encouragement. Marriage can't be done alone. And spiritually speaking you and Jesus aren't enough. We all need the witnesses of Jesus called the Church to bring correction and encouragement, or we will deconstruct in faith and in Marriage.

Extramental affairs are a cause of divorce. Like in ancient Israel and the body of believers today, you can't have other loves on the side. You can only have one love.

People get divorced because of a lack of compatibility. They think compatibility is liking the same adventures, sports, or hobbies. He likes what I like! But the compatibility issues come from how to do life together—the same thing with your spiritual walk with Jesus. Your recreational times, vacations, hobbies, and the like are not the focus. How you live your life day in and day out is the compatible issue. If you walk with Jesus, you must learn His way of life and leave your ways behind.

Lack of communication is a reason people divorce. If you don't spend time together, you will not understand each other. Communication is more than words. Contact will be lost when people don't spend time reading the Bible, praying, and worship.

Finances are a reason why people divorce. It is also why people divorce God publicly or silently; the love of money is greater than the love of the relationship. Whether a lot of money or no money, divorces happen.

Falling out of love is the reason many give for divorce. Both naturally and spiritually, they forgot why they fell in love in the first place. Jesus said Return to your first love. Naturally, this is not always possible because people do change and are not who they used to be. You must learn how to love that changed person. A wife gets saved and is no longer the carnal person the husband loved.

Not being ready for the commitment is a reason people get divorced. Jesus told His disciples to count the cost before following Him. The cost of following Jesus and getting married is the same, a mystery of Marriage. They both require laying down your life. You don't realize what all that entails when you say yes. But you should be a person of your word and be all in from the beginning, knowing it will cost you everything if you want a healthy marriage to your spouse and Jesus.

The loss of self is a reason people give for divorce. I could no longer be me. I need to find myself. You get what you paid for, so why are you trying to change me now? There is an unhealthy control in Marriage between an overpowering, controlling spouse. But in the Marriage to Jesus, we are called to decrease so He can increase. We are called to die to selfishness. Marriage to Jesus is to take up our cross and follow Him. We prefer Jesus follow us as we chase our other desires.

And then there is religious difference. There is a reason Paul tells us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers and, worse, with believers of a different faith. We are all religious, meaning our DNA cries out that there is a God who deserves worship and service. The fight is about who that God is and how to worship. Want to know who you worship? Look where you offer the most service and sacrifice. Jesus refused to worship at the feet of the devil and said, I shall worship God and serve Him only. Many silent quitters attend Church and worship in song and words, but their hearts are far from God. They serve themselves. They serve the appetites of their flesh while giving homage to a God they secretly do not like.

Loving God but not liking God is a dangerous place to be. If you stay in this position, you are easy prey for temptation. Eve was tempted to go her own way. Cain deconstructed and went his own way. Moses' first wife, Zipporah, silently quit after being offended over blood rituals and sacrifices. Seventy of Jesus' disciples weren't offended by the blood of circumcision or the blood of bulls and goats but by the shed blood of Jesus in which we receive the forgiveness of sin. Judas didn't like perfume poured out over the head of Jesus and went his way of the love of money. I could go on showing deconstruction, and silent quitting is nothing new to our day.

David almost deconstructed over his wilderness experience when He was supposed to be king. John the Baptist almost quit silently over the idea the real Messiah came to set the captives free, but John was in prison waiting for execution. Should I look for another Messiah? I could on here as well of the near misses on deconstructing and silent quitting.

 To love God is to love Him with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Our flesh is incompatible with the ways of the Spirit of God. Our old man does have irreconciled differences with the new spirit man we are to put on. God's ways are not our ways. But we are to not only love Him but become like Him by following the path of Jesus on the narrow path.

God's words and promises are often like honey to the mouth but sour to the stomach. We like to hear the benefits, but our flesh is repulsed regarding the doing. We need to do it anyway. That is, if you love God and like God enough for the Potter to remake you in His ways.

The mystery of Marriage is that we are to leave the world we are brought up in and cling to Jesus and His kingdom. We are not taken out of this world when translated into the Kingdom of Light. The world's ways are not our own. God's ways are our ways.

Marriage is difficult because two are to become one flesh. Marriage isn't becoming conjoined twins. And this isn't becoming the same spirit; Marriage ends with ashes to ashes and dust to dust. Marriage is two people agreeing to walk out life together. Marriage is difficult because neither partner has been this way before nor knows the way. But being married to Jesus, we don't have to wonder. Jesus has been this way. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life; the only way we seek the Father eternally.

If only we agree to the prayer of Jesus in John 17. Father, help us become one with You as Jesus and the Father are one. We don't want to deconstruct or silently quit You. We don't want a divorce or a separation. We love and like You. Help us be-like you more!